my world,my ozone,my earth,my asylum

YOU ARE NOT ALONE NAT(: YOU'll NEVER BE ALONE.NEVEREVEREVEREVERNEVEREVER(:

2009-12-07T18:45:00.000-08:00

you'll never be alone,

cz i'll always be there when you feel alone,
cz i'll always try to be there for you,
and i'll appear out of the blue just for you,

cz your important to me,
your important to my soul,
because of you im ME,

so BLESS your beautiful soul,

and the galaxy loves you,
like i do,

and you should know that,
so don't tell me that you haven't notice that,

and you know that God always test us,

because God loves us,

and he is always in your dream,

in your heart,

when you scream,

and when it's hard,

and ever since the early dawn,

God never leaves your side,

and so you should know that your never alone,

cz God is always there by your side.

JUST A THOUGHT.and this my thought

2009-12-04T05:35:00.000-08:00

when you make big mistakes,
that you aren't aware of,
you actually don't realise that your putting your life at stake,
just because of,

your minds a mess,
couldnt put it to rest,

everything is a test,

every moment is a race,
just couldnt find anything thats grace,to put in your life thats full of pace,

trying so hard to be the ace,
to be the shoe lace,

of a freaking converse shoes,

cz everything you do you dont want to lose,

and pride and ego is your power,

money and girls are your desire,
and to be the best,

you strive and solemnly swear to do your best,

and never gives up,
eventhough times up,
and eventhough you shed tears of blood,
you'll shed it till the last drop,
and eventhough theres huge floods,
you'll find a way to stay on top,
like flowers adapt with changes,
like bears adapt with new jungle rangers,

and dont be like a boar in the jungle,
or a girl/guy that likes to mingle,

and once a good person,

please remain to be that person,
once a villain,
please change to be a good civilian,

you only live once,
so dont make your loved ones,
cry or sad,

especially your mom and dad,

but who am i to say all this crap,
all i know is people judge me when i yap and yap,
and yeah i aint perfect,
neither will i be,
but your actions has its effects,

so i cant just let it be,
cz everything counts,
everything you do it mounts,
even lust,
even trust,
even just a small thought,

and eventhough its a good thought,
it'll change everything,
or anything,
that's related,
its like being infected,

by a deadly virus,
and good feelings become reversed,

clever people become imbeciles,
and swearing is just an everyday syllable,

and im totally stuck in the middle,
between hatred and love,
cz you know how to swindle,
everything including white doves,

and those innocent soul,
become vain in your appearance,
and you treat them like dolls,
but its good cz you gave them a valuable experience,
an experience called pain,

that drives them insane,
but its good that you make them remember that their just a normal being,
a weak creature that GOD gave an expression called feelings,
and don't forget why were on earth,

cz when our mother gave birth,
to us,
our only purpose,
is to serve the ALMIGHTY,
not to challenge the ALMIGHTY,
and look at yourself,

what do you feel,
cz when i look at myself,
i feel,that i don't deserve any of God's luxury,
even setting my eyes to see the earth's scenery,
cz i know im a sinner,
but that doesn't make me a non-believer.

to adillah 23.11 and to lii 25.11 (:

2009-11-24T07:12:00.000-08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!,
we should really go out someday,
just you and me,
sipping tea,
and nothing else but the beautiful,
blue sky,
and the sea that never goes dry,
and before i become history,
only remembered by people's memory,
i want this wish to be fully,
planted in YOUR memory,
so when you grow older,
you will still remember,
that this chinese looking guy,
is a good guy,
that once wished you beautifully,
on your birthday,
and he made it specially,
for someone he really cares,
so that you will carve his name in your heart,
and so it will be hard,
for you to forget him,
so be grateful to god and him,
cz he will always try to be there for you,
especially when you need someone to talk to,
and thanks for everything,
you are truly a wonderful being.

so have a nice day.hope your wish come true.LOVE YOU
-Lan-(:

hafiz reply 2(i didnt edit or mess with it)

2009-10-23T05:20:00.000-07:00

here come the ginger bread,
smack my face with your linger 'eulogy',
i guess it's not a medlan threat,
freak me with your idiot logic,
dark doesn't mean sucks,
coz it has nothing to do with you,
ask the god if you think that your a good fucking muck,
so there's no sorry anymore for you,
i never care bout how i look than u were,
i hope someday you'll get amerce,
so i'll pass you with my evil smile with the way you are,
then you'll repeat bout that sun-glass on my face,
so this how the thing goes,
your late with what happened in E's car earlier,
coz that funny khad said that the sun-glass fits on me with my nose,
but funny you joking around with your stupid carler,
so i guess i should get rid of you and evacuate,
with your energetic self-concern with no axiom,
truly disappoint me with the way you are as my mate,
wait,
i hope you'll get a little bit values of my idiom. . . .

drop dead time machine

2009-10-15T04:15:00.000-07:00

u can change the past,
build a time machine then fix your past,
and make every moment last,
every time it pass,
so stop whining,
and start doing something,
cz your a genius,
words in your brain are vicious,
can attack anyone anytime,
and some,
are offended by my rhyme,
so to you that are offended don't waste your time,
here,
cz your not welcome here,
and for your information,
for your puny little brain that knows no talent,
i didn't cross the line,
so no need being all worked up for nothing,
and this blog is mine,
so i have all the right to express my feeling,
cz im just another normal being,
that have feelings,
just like you,
but better than you,
maybe on the outside,
but inside,
definitely,
including every thing that's tiny,
every thing that's puny,
and invisible to the naked eye,
cz my,
soul,
was mold,
was blessed,
was cleansed,
from above,
cz i am loved,
by everyone,
and their mind,
and anyone,
that stumble upon this blog of mine.

never forget your roots

2009-10-10T02:09:00.000-07:00

the truth is,
there is no truth,
bout what i regret,
so much that it has come to hate,
is that i have feelings too,
don't just think bout you,
and ive told you before,
that im more complex than the air,
so dont come knocking at my door,
and saying that im not being fair,
and that your offended by me,
and now your telling the whole world to judge me,
you really dont realise that im actually more offended by you,
don't you?,
dude!you've forgotten about me,
that's why you know nothing bout me,
not even one of my cells,
than again everything that's hidden beneath my gazillion cells,
and like my alter ego told you,
im gonna keep reminding you,

"AH-HA
he has spoken,
but with million lies,
thats why our bond has broken,
and with all our ties,
HEY YOU!
this is my alter ego talking to you,
cz the real me doesnt trust you,
youve let him down,
now to him your no more than a clown"

unlike you,
i try not to forget my roots,
cz what i learned from the likes of you,
is that never treat someone like second hand boots,
appreciate them as who they are,
cz they would do the same no matter who you are.

EXPRESSIONS

2009-10-10T01:59:00.000-07:00

people please pardon my retardness,
and stupidness,
but accept my kindness,
and sincereness,

the truth is ugly,
and its known by many,
but i know your a pretender,
that fits a loser,
and as long as there's air to breath,
i wont believe,
your melancholic,
poetic,
outrageous,
promises,
and that's why from that,
there's that,
weird feeling,
that im experiencing,
that i rather be alone,
than being with hundreads of friends,
cz im tired of growing fond,
of them then they'll just leave you for other friends,

people have a lot to tell,
cz everyone have their own tale,
and i have one,
but my tale isn't done,

it wasn't me who left my friends,
but my friends who left me,
maybe this is a new trend,
that i was really busy to see,

and it's true a lot of cooks spoil the broth,
and a lot of bad mouths spoils the truth,
and to some,making rumours are a must,
that's why this world lacks of love and trust,

people always speak badly about hypocrites,
and now i know why,
cz they are pretenders and what they say aren't true and that reeks,
that's why it's better for them to die,
cz they just ruin friendship,
making hardship,
for you and your besties,
cz they lack of these,
love and attention,
cz what they possess are just lust that has no affection,
and because of a girl,
they would do anything,
this sickens me that i hurled,
and i wish i never met this being,

honestly,
being in the middle of a war of stupidity,
it sucks,
that's why i rather get struck,
by lightning,
than fighting,

you know that a song is the expression of the writer,
and this rhyme is the expression of me,
that's why im getting wiser,
than the old me,

but it's hard to express how you really feel,
especially in a rhyme like this one,
cz what you really feel,
cant be express by anything or anyone,

to NAT(: JO(: and BELL(: ,
i've something to tell,
i don't know why but i felt that warmth with you guys,
that warmth when you're with someone close,
and these are the new ties,
that i don't want to lose,
and im close to you guys,
doesn't mean i've forgotten bout my old ties,
and it doesn't mean im running away from anything,
it just mean im confused, sick and annoyed,
by all the dramas,rumours,back stabbers and unsatisfied feelings,
that's making me paranoid,

that's why it's hard to find a friend that you can really trust,
a friend that doesn't rely on lust,
a friend that remember what we've been through together,
a friend that cherish the moments we had together,
that's why im proud to say that meezy,mizan and yana are my besties,
and even though NAT(: ,jo,bell,azrul,zul,najib,ilyas,dillah,lii,een,wena,elaine,
leonard,leon and alvin are one species,
they are also my besties,
and i just realise this,
even though it doesn't seem to be,
but they are like family,
and now i know who are my true friends,
that i want to be with to the end.

P.S
THANKS A LOT NAT(: and everyone.
I APPRECIATE ALL THOSE SUPPORTS
AND JUST FOR BEING THERE FOR ME(:

LOVE YOU GUYS and EEN too(:

I DON'T NEED YOU

2009-09-14T05:01:00.000-07:00

i admit i have a big ego,
but smaller than a castle's door,
and im too proud to be proud,
cz what i do he's not proud,

and my english isn't always correct,
but nothing is perfect,
not even close to perfect,
even doing things,has its side effects,

even trust,
and when someone you trust,
the most,
is lost,
what would you do?,
would you just leave them out of the blue,
like they did to you?,
or would you be true,
to yourself and them,
and say damn,
leave me alone,
cz im on my own,
i don't need you,
after all,i survive this long without you,
and i don't need your sympathy,
nor your blessing,
cz in reality,
to me your a dead man walking.

dissing hafiz part 2

2009-09-09T06:39:00.000-07:00

and you said how am i gonna beat you,
well that might be true,
no wonder you think your better than me,
maybe your too advance for me,
cz i dont understand a fucking word in your rhyme,
maybe this was just a waste of time,
now your head over heels,
cz you think you can reply me,
honestly i feel,
your not the same standard as me,
maybe cz your a wannabe,
or going to be,
and i was right that your lower than me,
cz you should be dissing me,
not your parents that made you,
cz they expect a lot from you.
and you should check your error,
and your grammar,
cz you have a lot to do,
cz this is not your fantasy,
and if you don't know how to,
no use using your dictionary.

and what's this bout a girl,
i don't give a damn bout your ex or your girl,
why should i be lifting her mind,
should i change her mind?,
does she know bout your past?,
and is she your last?,
or just another addition,
to your collection,
and you think that your the best looking guy in the world,
and that the world,
twirls around you,
no wonder you left them out of the blue,
and i remembered in E's car when you wore those shades,you said your getting hotter,
well all i see is you getting darker,

and i don't assume,
cz girls don't like that,
so let me resume,
if you think that your all that,
i give you my word i speak the truth,
and nothing but the truth.

words of advice,
from a novice,
help yourself,
to not forget who yourself,
truly are,
from near or far,
and doesn't matter what your colours are.

hafiz's reply(i didnt edit o mess with it)

2009-09-09T06:25:00.000-07:00

this is a statement,
followed by my judgement,
im far away better from the way i am in your rhyme,
daaa,
if you dont believe,
u better ask my mother,
purely design by my father in their past time,
......
so now,
he's the man who i admire in my sport the most,
but why,
he's underestimating my workout,
i mean the 'girls' bout,
reversely pumped out,
the way im feeling sucked out,
....
no no no,
my friend,
he shouldnt put me down like this,
im wondering how would he lift up that girls mind instead mine?,
fine,
your not in my place,
so piss off,
from where you started to lit of,
every single word you assume im wrong,
.....
crazy make jokes in correction,
that makes him to think new discription,
and that revolution?
totally not in my dictionary,
coz its just addition,
......
tension,
hell no...
im tired,
so back off,
and feel my million dollar feeling,
healing your self concern.

new principle(dissing hafiz n 2 other guys)

2009-09-06T23:11:00.000-07:00

now people,
take a minute to digest this rhyme,
cz i've changed my principle,
to dissing just to spend my time,

he lost his talk,
what the fuck,
just continue to walk,
even though you suck,
even though life's hard,
and it's tearing you apart,

i just don't get this guy,
cz he always lie,
cant you make up your mind,
or do you need a piece of my mind,

sometimes its embarrassing,
to admit that i know you,
cz what im seeing,
is not the real you,
maybe your changing,
cz of the puberty that you're experiencing,

i'm not sure if he's a wannabe,
or trying so hard to be,
one,
but im sure im not one,
you know what,
i don't give a damn if you are,
cz your born like that,
and now i know how you truly are,
yeah we shared our times,
multiple times,
but that's all in the past,
cz everything doesn't last,

now he tries to rhyme,
trying to beat me with his rhyme,
so now is my time,
to diss him with this rhyme,
unlike you i don't use fancy word,
to act like i know all the fucking word,
in this world,
just to impress every girl,
that comes to you from every direction,
and now i have doubt bout you and your HIGH POSITION?,
and what revolution are you talking bout?
WAIT!
do you even know what revolution means?
or your just stuck at that roundabout,
trying so hard to figure what it means,
and while your at it,
figure something out to reply me,
cz im full of shit,
within me,
and its bursting out,
so i hope you can handle what's coming out.

i made this in 10 minutes,
and i don't deny it,
there's 3 people who i just dissed,
nothing personal,
but i was really pissed,
now hafiz,
reply me(:,
cz im bored,
so play with me will ya?

WHO ARE YOU?

2009-09-05T23:30:00.000-07:00

who are you?,
what are you?,
a vampire?,
a player?,
a shape shifter?,
a transformer?,

you think that your sooo clever,
you think that your a good lover?
the fact is your a loser,
but whatever,

you seriously dont deserve her,
cz she's waaaaayyyyyyyyy better than you,
cant believe i trusted you to take care of her,
and out of the blue,
you played her,
DAMN!
i just noticed that your lame,

hahahahaha,
bu hu hu hu,
how come your shedding those tears?,
i thought a crocodile couldn't shed any tears?,

there's a saying 'killing two birds with one stone',
but yours is 'fucking two girls with one dick',
that's why you ended up alone,
using those stupid trick.

RANDOM THOUGHTS WONT KILL

2009-08-24T15:03:00.000-07:00

a nightmare,
is not like a funfair,
but more like an affair,
that has gone bitterly,
and utterly wrong,
like a fat ass woman,
wearing nothing but thongs,
that is so suicidal,
not to mention superficial,
do you get my explanation,
or do you need a demonstration?

im no crocodile

2009-08-17T07:00:00.000-07:00

you should check behind the scenes,
to know how the story begins,
you shouldn't lashed out on me like that,
cz it'll only make me mad,

i only said some things,
then people make rumours out of it,
the fact is you don't know anything,
so just stay out of it,

dont just say things that you only hear or see,
you out of the people only say oh gee,
your a freaking loser chasing them girls,
but the fact is i only admire those girls,

there is no explanation,
for this admiration,
there is nothing wrong,
to admire if your single for so long,

yeah sure at times i can be senile,
but i can assure you im no crocodile,
but an ordinary offspring,
slowly becoming a human being.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY NAT(:

2009-08-01T06:33:00.000-07:00

it's fate,
that i met NAT(:,
cz she's a good mate,
but wouldn't make a good pet,

she's not too short,
and not too tall,
in short,
she's a cute being that beats them all,

she's not a tool,
but sometimes she's cool,
can be emotional,
but very special,

she likes things,
that are slimy,
and things,
that are greeny,
and she hates pink,
cz it's not her thing,

her eyes are shiny,
her smiles are lovely,
she's very funny,
and addicted to coffee,

she's good with vocabulary,
and sometimes i need a dictionary,
and a speedometer,
when talking to her,

cz she speaks very fast,
she speaks faster than she thinks,
but there's a girl that you can trust,
and a girl that's worth everything,

she's really creative,
and imaginative,
her drawings are extraordinary,
and envied by many,

once you've seen it,
you wont regret it,
cz the colours are made to believe,
even dead people come back to live,

and i know she's learning bahasa sarawak,
and i know she's not a chemistry person,
but people love sarawak,
and i love this person,

sure crapping is the natalie way(:,
and rhyming is my way,
so i hope you like the way,
i wish you happy birthday,

give your parents a kiss,
and make your wish,
blow your candle,
even though life's hard to handle,

and NAT your old,
but you still have a lot to live for,
so i hope your not bald,
the next time i see you at your door.

sincerely,
LAN(:

p.s.
happy birthday nat(:
love you

A MASTERPIECE

2009-07-29T23:59:00.000-07:00

sometimes its commonsense,
cz something just wont last,
but can you sense,
when someone's reminisce about their past,

all this memory,
all this sorry,
is just a burden i carry,
so now im gonna set it free,

but can all this noise fade,
cz i really need peace in my head,
and i wish i have a moment of silent,
even when there's a lot of noise,
cz life is testing my patience,
and waiting for me to make the right choice,

but it's too late,
i cant just rely on fate,
so i made a deal,
with the devil in disguise,
because i can feel,
when im being despise,

and im not a loser,
nor a poser,
but a mind reader,
and a composer,
i take words and arrange them into lines,
and amplify them into rhymes,

but im not getting stronger,
in fact weaker,
and im slowly losing,
this psychological warfare,
its like breathing,
in poison air,

but someday im gonna make a masterpiece,
work of art that have fluency and rhythm,
and the power to make world peace,
with a pinch of lithium.

an old friend of mine

2009-07-27T23:06:00.000-07:00

a person that's narrow minded,
tends to be offended,
even though he is charismatic,
he can somewhat be sick,

now he rolls with the big guns,
forgetting his flock,
he is always on the run,
on the verge of the clock,

and now the clock is ticking,
turning minutes to seconds,
i want you to hear when im talking,
if not i can destroy you within seconds,

with this rhyme or the next one,
cz im always number 1,
that's how it used and should be,
cz this is my life,
and im always gonna be better than you'll ever be,
in this life or the after life.

A THOUGHT

2009-07-25T14:30:00.000-07:00

a moment of grace,
was just a phase,
in my life,
up until now,
the thought of life,
and my vow,
was relinquished,
vanished,
in a distance,
far beyond existence,
that thought,
supposed to be a happy thought,
and my path should be straight,
instead,
it has ups and downs,
left and right,
which made me down,
and cant think right,
right now everything's a blur,
can't really decide what i want,
like my favorite color,
i'm not sure if i have 3,2 or just one,
all this confusion,
all this motion,
is making me nauseous,
sick to my stomach,
and i have to teach my mouth to be cautious,
cz i cant bare having another headache,
nor another heartache.

LOVE STORY TURNS BITTER

2009-07-25T14:14:00.000-07:00

are you conscious,
wipe the tears from your eyes,
is she your precious,
do you know her sacrifice,

do you know she's been taunt,
since the early dawn,
by an egoist,
who i hope cease to exist,

he's young and always drunk,
the opposite of a monk,
he always gambles,
when lady luck runs out,he starts to tremble,

he's a born womanizer,
things always become crazier,
i don't get why the bees want him,
he's nothing but a shrimp,

i bet he used to date a youngster,
cant they see his a monster,
i think he forgot he has a wife,
one thing for sure he never thinks about the after life,

he's a bad host,
he can disappear like a ghost,
especially when the sharks are in sight,
he'll send his wife to fight,

30 years he's been married,
always makes a fuss out of it,
life's full of luxury,
but he never fully fill his responsibility,

and he never say sorry,
maybe that's why he never give her any jewelery,
how much is a gold necklace?,
i bet its nothing compare to a palace,

now what happen to his friends?,
not one came when he's bankrupt,
maybe they're in vain,
because his corrupt,

he kept saying his the head of the family,
let me worry about the money,
don't be a busybody,
up until now she never see any penny,

and now he's overseas,
spending money that aren't his,
debts soars high,
she can only sigh,

this love story turns bitter,
he owns a pack full of haters,
people say no pain no game,
but what do they know,they're not the same,

you want to know the truth about pain,
it makes you insane,
but it talks to you,
and it shapes you,
one day you'll understand,
it'll make you a man.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2009-06-27T03:30:00.000-07:00

NAZIRA

a lot she have gain,
from triumph and pain,
the eyes and hair are brown,
suitable for a man with a crown,
and now your older,
wiser,
stronger,
and tougher than a bouncer,
your the star,
to a very special someone,
a star which is known as the north star,
a star which acts as a guide for someone,
a star which lights the night sky,
a star which beautifies the night sky,
you have a gift that makes people fly,
when they are high,
you too can make people sigh,
cz u possesses an aura of awesomeness,
and modestness,
as if your no mere mortal,
but an angel sent from the immortal,
cz ive never met anyone so kind,
to lend their ears and make it mine,
someone so beautiful,
that makes your life colorful,
someone so sweet,
sweeter than any sugar treat,
someone so special,
even her fingers are special,
someone so clever,
and a good lover,
someone so comforting and nice,
cz i can feel your warmth when im in the country of ice,
someone so grace,
cz when im with you my heart accelerates with pace,
these are the known facts that i know,
with time i will know more,
cz i know you wont go anywhere,
because beside god you lead my way,
and i dont need any map in my car,
cz i have you as my north star,
i just look up at the sky,
and i know i will never get lost even though im just a passerby.

nazira,
i hope you like it,
cz i mean everything in it,
so HAPPY 15th birthday,
your getting older by the day,
i wish i could celebrate with you,
just to show how much i miss you,
aaaaaaaaaa just blow your candle,
and make a wish,
cz i cant think of any more words that rhymes with candle,
so ive finish,
enjoy your day,
and take care.

-lan-(:

RUMOURS

2009-06-23T15:50:00.000-07:00

a million sorries to say,
cz i have to pay,
for the stupid things i said,
the rumours i spread,
bout the one's i care,
to the one's that i couldn't care less,
it's not fate,
it's just stupidness,
cz i told you a white lie,
but you still believe,
my words fills her with hot air,
she's right bout you being stupid just to believe,
those rumours,
for me its funny, and have sense of humour,
but to her,
im just another motherfucker,
honestly im scared,
cz ive heard stories bout her when she's mad,
but ive never experience it,
and i dont want to know how is it,
it really was foolish of me,
and inside im deeply sorry,
man ive never been in this position,
from now on ill be careful before making any notation.

CONDOLENCE

2009-06-22T19:58:00.000-07:00

i just heard,
from people that are worthy,
i know its hard,
and im deeply sorry,
the sun's come down,
the time pass by,
i know your feeling down,
because its hard to forever say goodbye,
i know you love your grandmother,
but its her time to go, to meet our maker,
in memories she will be forever,
i hope you will recover.

EMO BOY

2009-06-15T03:40:00.001-07:00

a guy full of pace,
doesn't really know how to be grace,
talking nonsense,
saying that's commonsense with an accent,
whats wrong with him,
just because of the girl that ditched him,
he becomes an annoying brat,
cant he see that life's like that,
just move on,
and make other girls turn on,
meet other girls and earn their trust,
don't do that because of lust,
think of your future,
for God's sake you've matured,
don't you want any kids,
im sure your parents want their grand kids.

RANDOMNITY

2009-06-15T03:40:00.000-07:00

four plus one in a room,
all doing their work,
but only one who gloom's,
cz he tries not to be a jerk,
tick tock tick tock,
the door goes knock knock,
an old man is at the door,
with him is a wild boar,
into the canvas they went,
after a few steps,
and all the time they spent,
finally now its a wrap.

The Beauty of A Woman

2009-06-14T18:47:00.000-07:00

The beauty of a woman,
Isn’t in the brand or expensive clothes she wears,
Nor the way she attracts man,
Or how translucent her underwear,
And not because of her nicely cut figure,
Nor her enormous breast,
Now I am starting to wonder,
If beauty only lies on the face,
And surely not the way she brings herself,
Or the way she dresses,
And definitely not how much plastic she adds to herself,
Just to bust her chest,
And not the time she spent on her hair,
Or the way she spends her money,
A woman that tries to be fair,
Is worth every penny,
But the beauty must be seen from her eyes,
Because her eyes is the doorway to her beautiful heart,
A heart that never lies,
The place where her sincerity,love and patience resides,
The beauty of a woman,
Is not like a plastic doll,
But true beauty in a woman,
Is reflected by her soul,
It’s the caring that she cares to give,
The passion that she shows,
That makes her partner lives,
With passing years it grows.

DIFFERENT

2009-06-12T03:09:00.000-07:00

i cant rhyme like i used to,
i cant express myself like i want to,
i tried my best,
maybe now i have different taste,
im not emo anymore,
and i dont feel anything,
so i have no reason to change anymore,
cz i have all my wanting,
but i will definitely change back,
if he comes back,
but now ive got nothing to tell,
cz my life tell its own tale,
and ive got nothing to share,
not even bout my new pair,
and happy as i am,
crazy as i am,
im still from a firm,
and tough sperm,
im not born with strings,
thats why im grateful that im living,
and experiencing all the wonders,
and bad stuff that occurs,
getting to know some angels,
and senile fugitives,
from different angles,
and different perspectives,
different magnitude,
different attitude,
different shoes,
different size,
different foes,
different lies,
different bonds,
different ties,
different tones,
different guys,
different sex,
different ex,
and all adds up to,
square root of two,
and thats pain and agony,
two different things,
like a phoney,
and the real thing.

random and boredom

2009-06-11T10:36:00.000-07:00

im not mourning over,
someone who's in my past,
im just thinking over,
that girl i loved last,
eventhough i grow older,
in my heart it still last.

. . . . . . . . .

2009-05-30T02:47:00.000-07:00

im just an offspring,
living my life as a normal being,
but all this while im suffering,
and you said nothing,
not a word,
not even a fucking word,
when i look in the mirror,
all i see is my clone,
a minor,
a drone,
eventhough im in a corner,
i am not alone,
cz i will never be alone,
my alter ego acts as my clone,
no doubt it has a mind of its own,
it taunts,
when im not myself,
it haunts,
when im all alone,
and its whispering,
to me to do things,
that never occur to me,
oh god its starting,
i just lost the real me,
............................
............................
............................
............................ . . . . .
im a minority,
yo motherfucker you know what that means?,
it means i have priority,
cz i have special genes,
and it made me feelingless,
anything i do i dont have second thoughts,
i dont think bout things that are pointless,
maybe thats why i want to slit your throat,
its not because im depressed,
its because i want to do things that are beneficial,
i admit my mind's a mess,
but your death is crucial,
cz i would stop being crazy,
and it would make millions happy,
so ill make you suffocate,
isnt that great,
fuck it,
i really want to shove your shit,
into your air hole,
cz your small asshole,
doesnt fit,
or maybe throw you in the pit,
that way youll just die,
wait that way you wont suffer,
hmmmmp. . .lets teach you to fly,
and a little bit of manner,
cz youve been calling yourself a fighter,
but that doesnt make you stronger,
so i wonder,
whos tougher,
whos smarter,
cz im pretty sure your stupid,
because of the things going on,
yeah i know your a hypocrypte,
and no less than a moron,
hey your lighter,
than all the air put together,
so i guess you could really fly,
easy for you to die,
so lets put you in a plane,
carry it with a crane,
smashing it to a train,
and burns everything in the rain,
if your not dead yet,
lets put salt to your wounds,
then burn your fat,
under the full moon,
then ill chop and dice,
your bird,
into thin slices,
even rats are alert,
they consume all of it,
didnt they realise the rashes on it,
now the next phase,
theres something wrong bout your face,
so ill smash your head,
this time youll be dead,
nothing personal,
but your not special,
and i have nothing against you,
but still,fuck the both of you,
two motherfuckers i hate most,
ive killed you,
so let me propose a toast,
to your soul and ghost,
............................
............................
............................ . . . . .
gosh this is not me,
whats wrong with me,
im nicer than this,
what did i do to desrve this. . . . . . . .

a person

2009-05-29T23:59:00.000-07:00

a person thats empty minded,

is not ordinary,

a person thats kind hearted,

is love by many,

a person thats obnoxious,

should always be cautious,

a person thats pretty,

will always find those who are wealthy,

a person thats creative,

is expressive and impressive,

a person like me,

is still not sure what his future will be,

a person like you,

is either like me or like you,

this is the world,

it spins and twirls,

this is fate,

you can let it take its course,

or you can create,

just dont be the source,

of hate.

YOU

2009-05-28T23:56:00.000-07:00

im just concern bout you,
im trying to keep my word,
that ill be there for you,
you dont appreciate that so fine.i wont say another word,
its not like im losing anything,
thats to my wanting.

ALTER EGO

2009-05-12T07:14:00.000-07:00

just being myself,
I get restless,
I really want to understand myself,
maybe changes,
can make it all better,
than ever,
cz im lost,
inside and out,
it feels like im a host,
to a parasite,
doing anything wont come out right,
like 1+1=3,
cant sleep at night,
its killing me,
this feeling,
this confusion,
is turning,
to an explosion,
it'll explodes in slow-motion,
I aint got no option,
just have to wait and see,
what becomes of me,
pray for me,
care for me,
cz i'll do the same,
if your in my shoes,
dont worry I aint saying names,
so just relax and enjoy the cruise,
but I aint taking blame,
if you become less than a man,
cz we endure different pain,
and mine would turn you insane,
E NI MI NI MY NI MO,
day by day it gets more and more,
friends that betray,
fathers who dont care,
players who live the day,
people who fucked up,
and tries to be a suck up,
but they wont last long,
and we should keep them astray,
cz you know theyre wrong,
and they should pay,
stars moon and skies,
all watching with million eyes,
still dont know what you did,
or there's more excuses to it,
you know your clothes doesnt fit,
by now you shouldve noticed it,
eventhough im LAN-JUNK,
but there's no excuse to treat me like junk,
the world's not fair,
but it still possessed feelings,
im more complex than the air,
still thinks that i have no feeling,
AH-HA
he has spoken,
but with million lies,
thats why our bond has broken,
and with all our ties,
HEY YOU!
this is my alter ego talking to you,
cz the real me doesnt trust you,
youve let him down,
now to him your no more than a clown.

JUST ANOTHER STORY

2009-05-12T00:05:00.000-07:00

this is a story,
its just the same old story,
last time i do respect him, but now. (haha)
allright, cmon, lets go!
it starts with do re mi
now its time for that dude to hate me,
man,
dont mess with my family member
i'll beat the shit out of you and make you remember
i aint scared though im not khali
cz i stand for my family,
im not trying to be a gangster
but dude, u played my sister
if anyone is in my shoes
for sure they would not be amused,
oh weeeeell player,
you know tactics
words so poetic,
tries to be fantastic?
but youre no more than classic,
proud of yourself?
geez.
well you and i know this,
what goes around comes around,
and it goes round and round like the merry go-round.

sincerely,
MEEZY

HAPPY MAMA's DAY

2009-05-11T03:08:00.000-07:00

MOTHERS of all,
I bid you HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY,
so stand up tall,
cz you own this day,
all the suffers,
all the regrets,
all the mutters,
all the mind sets,
all the pain,
all the sacrifice,
youve mend and tend,
is like a mice,
doing small things,
but with big effects,
and when I start doing crazy things,
and tries to be a maniac,
forgets who I really am,
tries to be other than myself,
a fractional second before losing myself,
you held me down,
make sure I stick to the ground,
you gave me a hug,
a kiss and listening ears,
you tug,
me in bed and wipe my tears,
you make everything fine,
cz you make it all go away,
then and then I stop to whine,
cz your not far away,
but sometimes I wonder,
cz everything youve been through makes you stronger,
taking things that are bitter,
and turns it to something sweeter,
I know life has been hard,
especially that guy who's in your heart,
always on the go,
trying to make more and more,
and he's always slacking,
saying that he's making something out of nothing,
but now you dont give a damn,
cz I know you dont need a man,
MAMA your stronger,
than five couples put all together,
cz you raise us ten,
better than anyone can,
MAMA im gonna be a man soon,
and I'll patch up all your wounds,
I'll kiss you,
I'll hug you,
I'll take good care of you,
cz im in debt to you,
I cant imagine if your not here,
maybe I'll pierce my ear,
drinking in an alley,
mugging molly,
kissing sally,
dating miley,
taking drugs,
eating pills,
cigarettes full in the mug,
doing anything that kills,
I dont want to be like this,
lost in the mist,
I know you'll leave me soon,
maybe on a full moon,
but dont worry,
you taught me well,
MAMA im sorry,
and ive got something to tell,
MAMA I LOVE YOU,
I really do,
eventhough I dont show it,
I want you to know that I really mean it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YANA

2009-05-07T04:48:00.000-07:00

E-elegant
L-lovely/loveable
Y-yearner
A-attractive
N-nice
A-adorable/appreciative

she's all of that,
thats why i like her,
she says she's fat,
but theres nothing wrong with her,
how long would you say,
have we known each other,
3 years i might say,
but it feels forever,
one day she'll own a range rover,
and teach it to roll over,
cz she's SMART,
almost in every part,
and she owns a pair,
of good set of ears,
only some would CARE,
when I shed my tears,
eventhough she's far away,
for me she tries to be there,
thats why,
I'll PROTECT her with my life,
eventhough I die,
I want her to be HAPPY with her life,
especially today,
cz its her birthday,
YANA im sorry,
cz i wish you late,
cz I want this to be in your memory,
thats why i stayed up late,
just to finish this rhyme,
on time,
YANA I love you,
so do all of our friends,
im glad that I met you,
cz to me your more than a friend,
your a FAMILY to me,
your a SISTER to me,
your the NICEST,
your the GREATEST,
your the BEST,
I wish you all the best,
hugs and kiss,
from me to you,
make a wish,
I'll try my best to make it come true

love,
lan
xoxox=)

STUPID ME

2009-05-07T00:36:00.000-07:00

now im having zealous,
doing things that are laborious,
so now im gonna be honest,
cz i broke my promises,
im the one they called finest,
out of all them im the modest,
and im also the eldest,
to my friends which are my brothers,
I used to be the nicest,
but now im in madness,
fill with all sort of sadness,
heart broken to pieces,
and the thought that im worthless,
made me brainless,
and regardless,
of all the advices,
that was passed to my ears,
I still take things that are hazardous,
cz people say its harmless,
and could take you places,
and gives you calmness,
but that thing made me heartless,
doing shits that are pointless,
killing my internal forces,
which are priceless,
and giving me all sort of sickness,
now I know its flawless,
full of faultness,
now I know only the stupidest,
take things that are poisonous

FOREVER FRIENDS

2009-05-06T03:11:00.000-07:00

O the almighty creator,
please hear my prayer,
I know I shouldve seeked you earlier,
cz I know im a sinner,
but please make me stronger,
and please make my crooked path straighter,
bcz I want to be a pioneer,
but sadly I have alot of hater,
they call me a loser,
and a poser,
thats why my heart becomes flatter,
all bcz of that fucker,
and im no more a dreamer,
cz now I know love is only chatter,
but friends is all that matter,
and it last FOREVER,

GRIEVE

2009-05-06T02:56:00.000-07:00

sure i have alot of grieve,
but it teach me to be creative,
now my life has been summarised,
so now im gonna rise,
Im tired of being an underdog,
I want to be recognize,
you really should compromise,
I dont bow down and bark like a dog,
you really shouldnt despise,
youll just end up in the morgue,
so be WISE.

RAPPERS

2009-05-05T07:52:00.000-07:00

Im dedicating this rhyme,
to the rappers of all time,
from the west,
to the east,
everybody including,
tupac and biggie small,
they werent fucking,
when they say they want to change it all,
11 years later,
after their death,
we still send them our prayers,
till our last breath,
but the feud is still there,
and now snoop dogg is the new papa bear,
but who's the head of east,
I really want eminem cz he can make peace,
with his rhyme,
which can kill time,
and I really hope this shits gonna stop,
cz its better than kim kardashian's new top,
I dont want to see young rappers,
die at young age,
just got his face up in the papers,
and die before even reaching the next page,
dont you pity his mama,
when she's told that her son died,
havent you heard bout karma,
is killing people what you call pried,
you got no respect for the industry,
their just trying to make a living,
why dont you just make pastry,
its better than being a dead man walking,
I really dont understand,
how can your conscience be so clear,
after pulling the trigger in the stance,
you didnt wink nor shed a tear,
I just want all of this to be over,
cz I dont want to be a moaner,
and so that we can be like we used to,
living in the streets of west and east peacefully too.

FAITH

2009-05-05T02:13:00.000-07:00

please have faith,
regardless of your wealth,
in sickness and in health,

i will LOVE you to my last breath.

PLAYERS

2009-05-05T01:15:00.000-07:00

For all the players out there,
this shit is for you,
all the girls are not your teddy bear,
their human beings just like you,
they have feelings just like you,
but they are not like you,
their better than you,
even bitches behave better than you,
above all they are not you,
your lower than a beggar,
lower than a street gangster,
you dont respect them,
you change girls like you own them,
I just want you to be decent,
dont brag bout your accent,
yeah i cant deny,
that your a sweet talker,
maybe thats why some girls become senile,
and ends up to be your stalker,
this is not jelousy,
this is not bout money,
this shit is bout players,
and how much i hate them,
please just say your prayers,
before you regret leaving them,
what goes around comes around,
havent you heard bout karma,
if you steal a thousand pound,
a thousand thing will happen to your mama,
then you tell me if its a good thing,
cz im pretty sure its a bad thing,
and if I know my fren is a player,
they better be ready cz ill send them to the undertaker,

sorries

2009-05-02T23:07:00.000-07:00

sorries . . .

sorry is just another word,

using it blindly may cause distraught,

its like killng with a blunt sword,

its not sharp bt it can still slit ur throat,

im fed up of hearng sorries,

espclly from feeble-minded ppl,

their good 8 makng stories,

bt m not stpd like some ppl,

i know i have cataract,

its a growth 8 the lens 2 b exact,

bt dont make lame excuses,

im the type of person that tries to finish his task,

is it wrong 2 ask a thousnd question?,

my father thought me to ask,

if u dont know the ans to the question,

cz its imprtnt for our life,

to ask is also a must,

especially bout the aftr life,

cz u cant live just based by lust,